Frustrations of a Nation-Builder

"Nick, tell me, why aren't we achieving our dream? You told us that we can do it, but why are there still children who have gone hungry? Why are there still a lot of poor people, corrupt government leaders-- if you consider them leaders at all? I'd been working a lot in the grassroots and I meet a lot of wonderful people doing good things, but why are we not changing the world? Why does evil still persist?"

"I need an answer, Nick. I have become impatient. I just wanted to cry for this country."

These are not lines from a telenovela nor from a movie. These are actual words of a 50-something lady who, after all her efforts in developing the grassroots and doing some nation-building acts, had become so frustrated seeing so little results. She was crying-- asking and questioning her mentor if what they had been doing really makes a difference.

After more than 30 years of working for community development, her frustration grew. She felt impatient that a lot of things they wanted to change still haven't changed-- that a lot of their dreams for the country still seem so far from what they have imagined-- at least from her perspective.

I began to feel afraid. I start questioning myself and my capacity to change the world. I felt scared that my optimism might develop into frustration. I felt afraid that I might grow old, see little results, become disappointed and stop hoping and loving this country.

I asked one of my mentors who's around 60-something, if he think we could end hunger, poverty, war and all the negative things there are in this world and if we can ever be in Utopia.
I told him about this crying lady. I asked him if he, while doing a lot of good things for others, feels the same frustration given that there are still a lot of changing-the-world that has to be done.

In response, he emailed me this poem and told me to understand it in the context of what I was asking him:

A Future Not Our Own

It helps now and then to step back and take a long view.
The Kingdom is not only beyond our efforts,
it is beyond our vision.
We accomplish in our lifetime only a fraction
of the magnificent enterprise that is God's work.
Nothing we do is complete, which is another way
of saying that the kingdom always lies beyond us.
No statement says all that could be said.
No prayer fully expresses our faith. No confession
brings perfection, no pastoral visit brings wholeness.
No program accomplishes the Church's mission.
No set of goals and objectives include everything.

This is what we are about. We plant seeds that one
day will grow. We water the seeds already planted
knowing that they hold future promise.
We lay foundations that will need further development.
We provide yeast that produces effects
far beyond our capabilities.

We cannot do everything, and there is a sense of
liberation in realizing this.
This enables us to do something, and to do it very well.
It may be incomplete, but it is a beginning,
a step along the way, an opportunity for the Lord's
grace to enter and do the rest.

We may never see the end results, but that is the
difference between the master builder and the worker.
We are workers, not master builders, ministers, not
messiahs. We are prophets of a future not our own.

-The Journey with Jesus: Poems and Prayers, Selected by Dan Clendenin

Since I started working for community development, I've always dreamed that one day I will change the world, even if it means having to sacrifice my life. I was, and I still think am, young, highly idealistic and full of zeal. Now I have come to realize that those aren't enough to achieve the dream world. Well, at least for now.

I'd thought that I am too crazy to be wanting to change the world, only to find out that I already have. By planting the seeds of goodness and hope today and for the rest of my days, I have sown plants that can grow far higher than what I can perceive-- for when I accepted my limitations, I become limitless.

This is the beauty of life and the wonder of changing the world.

The Year It Was: Of Expanding Horizons and Storytelling

When I was younger I always dream to ride an airplane. I was positive that one day I will. Eventually, I did and 100% of my rides, I didn’t have to pay. I told myself that if my optimism and the work that I do can make me fly all over the country for free, why not wish for something bigger, perhaps farther? So this year, despite not having any flight tickets abroad booked, I’ve decided to get a passport. Months after, I got to travel abroad for the first time and a second international flight came knocking-in two weeks after. Both travels, I also didn’t have to pay.

I’m not writing these to boast or to sound so great, but I’m doing so because I want to emphasize that the power of our positive mind, if coupled with work, can really bring us to places--places we’ve never been and places we’ve never thought we could be.

The year 2013 proved to me that there are no limits to our dreams. As I would always say whenever I story-tell our work for the rehabilitation of the Maningning Creek-- impossible is temporary. And so I choose to expand my horizons and kept on believing that we can change the world.

Here are the highlights of my 2013 and some key takeaways, too. Hope it may inspire people to be positive and to work for what they believe in, no matter how impossible it may look like.

Some Storytelling

This year, with no exaggeration, I think I’ve shared the story of the Maningning creek and of our organization for more than 50 times, reaching at least 1,000 audiences around the globe.  Here are some of my storytelling sessions—a life mission that I began to embrace:

a. 2nd Pilipinas Rotaract National Convention

Photo from Banoar Abratique

Our organization’s win as one of the Ten Accomplished Youth Organizations (TAYO) in the country opened up a lot of opportunities.  This speaking engagement came knocking the earliest and it was the first time I will be presenting the Save Maningning Project outside the TAYO competition. I was very nervous. Not to mention the fact that before me, it was Gawad Kalinga who presented their noble work of building thousands of houses all over the country and their vision of a nation without slums. But our years of working for the Maningning saved me. I guess, no act of goodness is too small if done with great love.

b. Pandayan 2013: The Central Luzon Youth Agenda 

Photo from Darren Gonzales

            See that flower on me? I think the last time I wore something like that was when I graduated high school. I was tagged here by fellow Ayala Young Leaders Alumni to talk about climate change and of course, what we've done for Maningning. This time, I come prepared. I was able to design a (crazy) deck that the youth can relate with (people who have seen my slides would know why). But lo and behold, speaking at the same event was then Senatoriable, Senator Cynthia Villar, representatives from the Philippine Rice Institute and some ADB folks as well. This talk got me though to my first Asia Pacific conference-- the Asia Water Week.

c. Bicol University Student Leaders’ Assembly

           
            I literally braved a storm just to get to this talk. Thanks to my dad’s 4x4 that I was able to make it to the airport where I stayed for more than 8 hours. It was long enough to make me almost miss the whole event, where I became the guest speaker and the closing remarks. The president of the school approached me after my talk and told me that what I shared is the best way to end the program. She said that their students needed a call to action, and that they have to realize that they can really do something with their leadership. See? The storm and the delayed flight were just blessings in disguise.

d. 2^nd Philippine Scholars’ Summit

Instagram photo from Camille Recalde

            This is one of my most emotional talks. Minutes before I presented, I received a call from the National Youth Commission informing me that our organization, Angat Kabataan was selected to represent the country in the ASEAN TAYO and the ASEAN Youth Day Meeting. It set the floor on fire and I think it made the audience believe that hard work pays off. It also kinda helped me improve my confidence since the person who spoke before me was no less than the CNN Hero of the Year, Efren Penaflorida.

e. St. Vincent Foundation for Children and the Aging National Scholars’ Assembly

            We were in the middle of the election campaigns when the invitation came. But how can I say no to the group that taught us how to make use of the bokashi balls in cleaning the Maningning Creek? I found out that the foundation wants their scholars to give back by doing projects for the community. And so I started by telling them our organization’s humble beginnings, our struggles and how we were able to hurdle them. One of the participants came to me after my presentation telling me how excited she was to go back to her community and do something. From that moment on, I knew I was on for a mission.

f. TAYO NCR Area Finals

Photo from Ten Accomplished Youth Organizations Facebook page

            Speaking of pay back, I also cannot say no to the institution that gave our organization our long awaited break. I was able to present the Maningning to the next batch of Area finalists and facilitate their teambuilding too. It’s always so nice to be with people whom you know are doing the same line of work, and that is nation building.

Aside from these, I’ve also been able to present the Save Maningning Project at the Asia Water Week, at Pitogo Youth Club’s orientation of new members, at the Taytay United Methodist Church, at the ADB Bearcat Experience, LeadCom Batangas Orientation, more than 20 times at the LEAD ASEAN Youth Summit and at the ASEAN Youth Day Meeting as well.

Rubbing Elbows along the Way

One of the best perks of going to places is meeting new people. Through work and many other side events this year, I was able to interact with the following people who have given me different perspectives on things, which almost always are better than my often boxed thinking.

a. Tony Oposa

Photo from Bea Laino, a fellow delegate (And yes, that's me so eager to ask a question. haha)

Words can't describe how amazing this guy is-- clear passion, strong advocacy, crazy and unconventional thinker. I could die when he told me, "Very good, Tobit" when I encouraged fellow delegates on an ASEAN summit to run for public office if their government is a bit non-participative. On top of that, I’ve got the chance to corner him that night as he shared passionately his crazy ideas, affirming my belief that really, crazy people will change the world.

b. Tony Meloto

Photo courtesy of Erika Dimaguila

I've always been hearing a lot of stories about GK. I think I've already volunteered twice and I thought I've already had enough grasp of it, not until I met the mind behind GK. He toured us around the GK Enchanted farm in Anggat Bulacan as he describe in details his vision for the world's first farm village university and his vision for this country as they develop communities that are sustainable. Like Tony Oposa, this man is brave and borderline crazy for wanting to change the world and for actually little by little, doing it.

e. Issa Cuevas-Santos

Photo from smashpipe.com

This year too, I've got the chance to be part of the 1st batch of Microsoft's Innovate for Good. Of all our speakers, Issa struck me the most. Hearing her stories lets you know that she has had enough experience on the ground. Her experiences aren't always great and happy, but as she said, "Life sucks. Embrace it."

f. Sr. Eva Maamo

Photo from Darren Gonzales

I was tasked to navigate her powerpoint presentation during the 15th AYLC. As she goes through her 125 slides deck, I asked myself, 'why is this woman not a saint?' She is a living proof that God exists. She's devoted her life as a nun, missionary and as a doctor. For me, she's done miracles--but she would humbly say it was God's hands who healed the sick and perform crucial operations where no life was put to waste.

g. Fr. Boy Salvador

Photo from Bea Laino

Coffee with whisky, big bikes and guns of all sizes -- these are the things Fr. Boy will welcome you with if you pay him a visit in Laguna. Being the head of the Don Bosco community in the Calauan relocation site, he's also become the father to a community, who in the past have lost their sense of being one. Everyday, he deals with issues of juvenile delinquency, cup-of-noodle-for-sex-scheme and rape. But he also deals and deals well with hope and strong faith. I have faith that his faith and compassion for the poor will change the landscape of Southville 7 and his coolness will make him accomplish things faster.

d. JQ Quesada and Monchito Mossesgeld

JQ's the one on extreme left and Monchito's at the center. Photo from Gladyss Documento

One of the reasons why I do not have plans of leaving my work in Ayala Foundation is getting to work everyday with a Monchito and a JQ. Monchito is the structured one. He wants to make sure everything's planned well and he doesn't like too much risk. JQ on the other hand, is a risk taker. He's the kind of person who will say, 'Let's go try it. It's learning anyway.’ So imagine the two of them together. Do you think it's unfortunate? I don't think so. They give me two correct perspectives, which when combined, never fails. Everyday with them is pouring with wisdom, learning and so much fun.

This year, I also got to meet Ambassadors Cusia (PH to the US), Carden (US to the ASEAN), Goldberg (US to PH), Charles Tiu, Expo Mejia and dozens of international friends from the ASEAN region.

On Winning Battles

Great things come not just to those who wait, but for those people who work hard and who work with so much love. For many years, my organization and I have fought for good governance, have fought to be heard, and have done things that are alternatives to the things that we criticize in our local government. This year, we can say, we have emerged victorious. And that means, we can and we definitely will, continue doing what we know is right towards our dream community.

a. Angat Kabataan’s Legal Identity and Seat in LPRAT

Photo from Glody Biason

At last, after four years, we are now SEC Registered! We now have a legal entity as a non-stock, not-for-profit organization. After four years, we also now have our organizational structure and our focus areas. As the first elected President of the organization, I can’t help but be proud. I can say, that throughout this year, our transformation moved 2 notches higher. We are maturing and we’re on to level up our initiatives and to level up what we do in our community. We are on to prove it. We also just got the chairmanship to our Local Government Unit’s Local Poverty Reduction Action Team Youth Sector, giving us the right and authority to design and decide on projects that the youth of our municipality needs and will benefit from. We’re all excited!

b. Getting into the System

Photo from Barangay Sta.Ana's facebook page

            I always believe that one good way to change the system is to penetrate it and to change it from within. That’s why more than criticizing what the government lacks, I am more leaning to running so that I can work with what’s lacking. My decision to run as a local village councilor has been clear to me ever since 2010, but this year, I took the big leap. The 9-days of campaign might be the most tiring days of my life, but it’s the most fulfilling as well for I had the chance to see the situation of our barangay. I wasn’t able to meet all its 80,000 residents, but I will do my best to make a positive impact to them through the responsibility they entrusted me in this win.

c. Angat Kabataan’s as one of the TAYO ASEAN

            When I got the confirmation that we were chosen as one of the TAYO ASEAN awardees, I instantly had a flashback. I went back to the moment where we were accomplishing our form for TAYO Ph. We were all thinking, ‘will we make it? Our project is too simple.’ But despite these kinds of thoughts, we decided to push through and I’ll forever be grateful that we did. This award is more of an affirmation for us. It affirms that what we do is right and that we should continue doing good. It’s a pressure, yes it is, but it’s a motivating force as well—a force that fuels our desire to transform our love for country to concrete actions.

Expanding Knowledge and Networks

I always like to attend seminars and conferences. You will always see me in front rows because I believe that these are the million dollar seats and I always look forward to pick up the speakers’ brain and make the most network possible. In 2013, I was fortunate enough to attend the following seminars where I realized how small our world is, how interconnected our issues are locally and internationally and how we can collaborate to make things better.

a. Asia Water Week 2013

            Our work for rehabilitating our waterways earned us some slots for the Asia Water Week, organized by the Asian Development Bank. It was a week of meeting execs from private and non-government organizations all over Asia and of making the youth’s voice be heard. It aims to achieve water for all in Asia while addressing three major water issues: too much water, too little water and dirty water. On the last day, I’ve got the chance to present the Maningning project as a case study on how the youth can be a major player in addressing water issues.

b. ASEAN Youth Day Meeting

            As one of the TAYO ASEAN awardees, I’ve got the chance to attend this event held in Hanoi, Vietnam. Basically, the event was a venue to present best practices from the ASEAN region as Youth and TAYO awardees from the 10 countries presented their projects and the things that they do. Here, I met young people raising funds to provide boots for boundary soldiers, youth promoting leadership throughout their country and many other people with some stories to tell. It was an amazing experience. It made me more hopeful that the ASEAN will prosper even before 2015 and that the youth will be a big part of it.

c. Asia Pacific General Council for Water Meeting

Photo from ADB and Civil Society Facebook page

            In 2015, Korea will be hosting the 7th World Water Forum. This meeting is in preparation for that big event that Asia is hosting for the first time. To give some flavor to this very serious meeting, ADB decided to involve the youth and gave us seats in this meeting to discuss how the youth can participate in shaping  the World Water Week. As a case study, I was also able to present the Maningning Project here.

d. LEAD ASEAN Summit

           

Photo from LEAD ASEAN Summit Secretariat

              For quite some time, my boss had been very busy for a program that our unit is partnering with the US Embassy. I never knew that I will attend this gathering as a participant until I was recommended by the Ayala Young Leaders to attend this ASEAN event given my  background on development work and strong advocacy on environment and river rehabilitation. In a span of less than a month, I had my 2nd ASEAN conference. I don't know how all these happened, but one thing's for sure-- if it's clear to you why you do what you do, you're ready to face the world and influence people. Next thing you know, the universe has already conspired to make things happen.

e. Microsoft's Innovate for Good

Photo from Erika Dimaguila

                    This workshop is a middle-of-the-year dose of inspiration. Here, I learned how to use innovation for social good and that it is really important for us youth to be creative in pushing through with our advocacy. The world needs new, bold and unconventional ideas. Who could best come up with such ideas other than the youth?

Throughout the year, my work allowed me as well to attend important seminars that are meaningful not just for work, but for everyday living. This includes: Project Management Training, Service Excellence Workshop, Shujog Impact Assessment Course in Singapore, talks on financial wellness and critical thinking and the 2nd Ayala Group Sustainability Summit.

Reaching New Grounds
 

And then I was on it. My first international flight headed to Singapore. The feeling was nostalgic for I have believed and claimed that I'll be at the same moment long time ago when I dreamed that someday, I will ride an airplane.

a. Singapore
    

            I was enrolled by my company in an Impact Assessment course in SG. My boss asked me to extend, since it's my first trip abroad. Travel abroad alone, DONE! Went around the city taking selfies (pardon the selfies, I was alone! haha), ride the SG flyer, went to Universal Studios in Sentosa and enjoyed the privilege of being a single rider (yes, you get to skip the long queues!). I enjoyed the feeling of getting lost and finding the right way, speaking English the whole time and that solitary moment where I felt there's still a lot to explore in this world and that I can live 'borderless.'

b. Vietnam 
 

Photo from Romzi Ahmad

I got to Vietnam by the virtue of being the representative of my organization to receive the TAYO ASEAN Award and as a representative of the country in the ASEAN Youth Day Meeting. Our third and fourth day there were spent for a tour in Ho Chi Minh City and in Ha Long Bay, respectively. I will never forget the motorcycles (and I mean lots of it), Pho after having a few bottles of Hanoi beer, the great yet very humble Ho Chi Minh and his museleum and the many friends I made in Vietnam. I promise myself that I'll be back there soon, and I know I will.

The year that was...

Photo from google image

 It was a year full of growth and aspirations. It was the year where I realized that our horizons are far wider than what our eyes can see. That beyond the skyline and the sea, there are greater wonders in store. We just have to keep on seeking, to keep on moving and to keep on believing.

I welcome 2014 with arms wide open, ready to sail on, explore, get lost, find my way back and journey on! :)